Boobylicious

So, if the black clad women at Victoria's Secret are to be trusted, I am a 36C. This is good to know. Improper support of breasts can lead to bad things and having a bra that is too tight (which most women have) is very bad for you.

When I first became involved with my then boyfriend, now husband, I didn't need to wear a bra. I tight enough shirt did the trick. They were able to defy gravity, they were firm, various tendons and ligaments doing a good job of keeping my boobs where they should be. I was lacking in the cleavage department, but had been told I had 'perfect' breasts by no less than 3 guys. Of course, being an idiot, I had thought they were 'too small' for a while but a good relationship and becoming more comfortable with my body made me realize that my boobs were perfect for me and what was required of them.

As the years of stability went on, I put on a bit of weight and became a bit more filled out. It's as if being in a happy relationship made me hit Puberty Part 2: You Get a Butt. A tight shirt was still pretty much all I needed, though it was considerably tigher. I hated wearing bras and wore them when I had to.

Then: pregnancy. Goodbye normal boobs. Hello utilitarian mammalian protuberances. Bigger, insane, manufacturing things that seemed to have minds of their own. I remember being horrified when my milk came in. I looked like I had implants. It was like something out of science fiction, altogether in line with what I had just undergone the previous nine months and experiencing at the time. Thankfully, over the two years my boobs have been required for nourishment, they have calmed down and gotten smaller. But they are not the handful they used to be. I'm bigger. They're bigger. And they need support.

I should say right off the bat, I hate buying clothes in general. I generally think garments aren't worth what they are being sold for. I also have issues with places that are overly girly. Needless to say, I have to give myself a mental pep talk before I walked into VS today.

The girls talked to me about various things and smiled and gave me their names. I even tried on a...thing. This weird, gel type strapless bra thingy (up to 15 uses! For 68 dollars?!). But in the end, I couldn't bring myself to buy anything, even though I needed it. One, because I actually don't like VS stuff all that much. And it seemed like a lot to spend on something that was basically underwear.

So I still don't have a strapless bra which I need to war for my husband's graduation. I still have my relatively inexpensive sports bras that actually feel good and are comfy and don't have underwires. But I still have boobs.

What the heck am I going to do with them?